Dear Grandma Sandy,
I got the call from mom at 11:15pm. I knew that because she called at 11:15pm there was something wrong..she never stays up that late on a Sunday night! When she said she had news, I asked if it was good or bad. She replied bad. My heart sank and my mind began to spin, wondering what it could be. Then she told me… You had passed on earlier tonight.
I just spoke with you a few days ago, talking about your heart surgery scheduled in late May and giving you love and support while you were in the hospital with broken ribs from a tough fall and awaiting news on possible pancreatic cancer. You sounded a little bit weak, but much stronger than I would’ve sounded. You went through so much in life, but managed to live on until now. The strength you had to always keep fighting was unimaginable in my eyes.
I am so incredibly lucky to have you as one of my grandmas. Hanging out with you when I was little, sitting on your lap on a rocking chair. Sitting out on the deck in my backyard with you, soaking up the warm sun. Taking my high school graduation pictures, where you kept talking about how fast I grew up and how you couldn’t believe her baby grandchild was so old!
It always brought me joy to see you and Grandpa Jerry walk into the house when you’d come to visit. And seeing you in Florida at Disney world and at your house was always a lot of fun- especially the time we were there for Christmas. And I can’t forget the times we had together at the log cabin up in Wisconsin- I still love that place, even though I haven’t been there in years.
While many things in our family have changed throughout the years, you were always there. You were always happy and excited to see me, and you always loved talking to me on the phone and emailing back and forth. You were always so encouraging, from when it came to getting the family together all at once to shopping trips to Trader Joes. You always showed so much love.
While my mom said that it was bad news, which it is, it is also good news. Don’t get me wrong- I am sad, very sad, that the last time I ever get to talk to you was last week and the last time I saw you was before I even started college. I was looking forward to seeing you in a few weeks and was looking forward to talking to you more after you heard from the doctor. But, on the other hand, this is good news. God took you up to heaven, knowing that you were suffering down on earth. You no longer have pain from broken ribs, or heart problems, or possible pancreatic cancer. You are now up in heaven, and will always be with me. While before you were worried about missing Ryan’s graduation, you’ll now have the best seat in the house.
I know that tonight you entered the most glorious place, and I’m excited for you. You have no more pain and you are surrounded with love. I can’t tell you how much I love you and how much it pains me to see you leave, but I have to accept that I know you’re in a much better place. Now, you will always be with me. You’re pain-free. You’re surrounded with love and triumph… and why would I want to take that wonderfulness away from you? Enjoy it! Love it!
I love you, Grandma Sandy, and you will be so greatly missed.